How do I deal with parents procrastinating with funding reimbursing? (closed)

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#1

I finally got my funding from the provincial government late last month which is when I got my computer even if it wasn’t put up until Nov 2nd. Thing is according the to the funding rules-you’re suppose to IMMEDIATELY send the invoice in of whatever it is that you have brought. I’m not my own “funding manager” my parents are but my parents have spend a bacon month on their behinds not doing a thing. Their first problem was because of whomever was our contact person at the funding place apparently had forgotten I was new to the funding program so their instructions was “to fill out the form like we have before” . Mom wants to do the eclaim version of the form… but she SAID she would do it Friday but today is Sunday and it’s STILL not done. If I was my own bacon funding manager I would have gotten it down as soon as I gotten the dam computer even if it wasn’t set up.

It just I keep bugging my bacon parents about it because not only 1)we need to send it in ASAP, and 2)it takes 30 bacon days to get reimbursed for it and when you consider the last 2 weeks out of the four of Dec are the bacon winter holidays that means even if we don’t do it by the end of next week, we wouldn’t probably get reimbursed until the middle if not late January if not sometime in February because of my parents procrastinating.

But they’re getting tired of my agitating them they said “it’s going to get done” but I’m sick of them hearing them saying that because it’s been a month and they found one excuse after a bacon another not to get it done. Like I said, if I was my own funding manager I would have gotten it done as soon as I got the computer in Late October. Since at the rate it’s going my parents are going to be one of those people who are going to have to rush to get it in before March 2022 which is the end of the quarterly year for funding folks which one should absolutely NOT do.

And my parents want me to learn the value of bacon dollar… how can I trust them with that if they can’t get the value of this form in in a sensible time?

#2

I understand it’s frustrating, and you want your parents to have it done. However, since you already asked them several times apparently, I guess there is not much else to do besides doing it yourself (which you’re probably not able because they need to sign something for it).

On the other hand, if they are your funding managers, what difference does it make for you if they procrastinate?
Maybe the solution is to just let it go, and try to not let it bother you, however hard that may be.

#3

It just it seems they (my parents) use every excuse after a fucking another not to get it done. And I want to get it in before March of 2022 because the funding folks use I guess something business fiscal year unlike the rest of the society where the year is Jan 1st-Dec 31st. Well the funding folks have their “year” end at March.

I mean setting up the bloody eclaim registry seems to be simple as 1,2,3 or a, b, c. Since they know my names and they have my client number in the papers we got from the parent company of the funding. people.

One of the information online about the funding reimbursement says to get it in ASAP and not to wait until late April because there’s will be a rush of other people doing that whom are also on Passport. And also like I said in my OP it takes within 31 days to get reimbursed.

I can’t do it myself because they’re the ones who are suppose to be doing this work but I’m just getting flashbacks of them procrastinating when I wanted them to start me on the process to getting psych assessment (which was the first step to get me onto Development Services/Passport in the bloody first place).

At the rate’s its taking I want to set it up my bloody self even though I will be putting my dad on their as my main “funding manager” just like the fact I’m the one who had to make bloody phone call to get the steps ready to get a pysche assessment.

Mom has a list upstairs in the main bathroom upstairs and it says: cookies (crossed out), church(crossed out), library (crossed out), towels (Crossed out) and eclaim (the only thing not crossed out). Mom always says she will do something but it takes her a week after she says she will do it or longer. And from beginning of Nov I said I wouldn’t have a cow until Nov 19th well it’s past Nov 19th… and they STILL haven’t done anything. Mom said on FRIDAY she would do it that NIGHT and yet, its SUNDAY and yet she STILL hasn’t done it.

I would stop bugging them about it if they would get off their assess and actually set up the bloody account for me so we can continue on with getting the reimbursement already. I didn’t even want my parents to be the funding manager but it’s like when I actually got my first bank card, Dad had gotten it into his head to be my “money manager” and I was 25 at the time.

And they also know I follow the bloody rules and I’m trying to get them to follow the same bloody rules for this funding but they keep making excuse after. (The only exception is if I’m at the mall on Saturday with friends). It’s one thing when the contact person had forgotten but now they know of the eclaim…what’s stopping them but their lazy *** from actually setting up the account?

They have plenty of time in the day… maybe if we watched the news less, or have Mom read less of the paper out loud to Dad the sooner the reimbursement form can be sent in.

What am I suppose to do sit down with them and MAKE them do it? That will go over nicely /s

I mean typical day:
Get up, shower, get dressed, go to computer until 11:46, go have lunch, go back to the computer. until Mom calls me for fruit, go have that and yogurt, empty dishwasher, set the table, go back to the computer, around 2pm go for a walk (or do some other form of exercise), go back to the computer until time for supper, pour drinks for supper, eat supper, and clear off the table.

After the fruit, and after Mom makes her tea, she’s on the couch reading the paper, or sometimes read it out loud to my father, and she might occasionally glance on the TV if it’s on one of the news channels- and if she doesn’t take a nap, by the time it’s around 6:30pm (on a Friday at least-the rest of the week she makes supper ) she’s doing the crosswords in the newspaper. And that’s not including times when Dad asks her to “proofread his email” he’s going to send or trying to get something done which involves both of them.

How can I trust them in teaching me on how to budget and such which was something Mom talked about with not the psych person, but the 2nd person we talked too to fill out the two forms for getting onto Development services… when they’re this lazy with getting remburisement form in? And they’re this lazy with their actual taxes as well-but hey at least in that case is because Dad’s always misplacing all the papers he needs, the only paper my parents need to set up this online form registration is in the binder in the DINNING ROOM

#4

Well think of it this way. You should be glad it’s March and not December. If it was the end of December you’d have a lot less time to put it in since it’s almost December now. I understand you’re frustrated but in my experience the more you bug someone about something the less likely they’re going f to do what you want them to do.

#5

Think about what’ll happen if they don’t actually get the form in on time.

Based on what you’ve said before, I’m guessing what happened is that you paid for the computer out of your own money and you’re waiting for the funding to reimburse you. You were willing to use your own money to pay for it anyway, right? So even if you don’t get the reimbursement, you still have your computer and you didn’t spend more than you were willing to pay for it on your own. The reimbursement is something your parents were insisting on, not something you wanted.

And if they don’t get the form in on time, you pretty much have free reign to guilt them anytime they claim you’re irresponsible.

As PublishedAuthor says, bothering people makes them less likely to do what you’re telling them to do, and the only consequences that fall on you are ones you were willing to bear. I’d suggest waiting until the end of January at least to start bothering them again. Your mom has a reminder set up, so it’s likely your parents will do it sooner or later. And not bothering them will make you look more mature, which is something you’re aiming for.

(And I don’t need a complete rehashing of all the backstory of the Computer Saga.)

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#6

She keeps saying “she will do it soon” but then she doesn’t. She said on Friday while I was making that night’s supper she would get it done that night. It’s Sunday and she didn’t do it on Friday. And now she’s claiming that it will get done in the next few days. Knowing her it wouldn’t be done until Christmas Eve or later /s

I told Dad I should have paid for the computer but Dad insisted on paying for it “just in case he needed to argue later with the store”. My parents think the funding is for the family-which isn’t true it’s in MY name not Dad’s or Mom’s name. Its MY funding.

#7

If he paid for it with his own money and the funding is only under your name, then how is he supposed to claim the funding? Even if the computer is meant for you, you didn’t make the purchase. That sounds like something that would get your family investigated for fraud.

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#8

under my name, but Dad’s the funding manager. My parents didn’t give me a say on who got to be the funding manager. If I had been able to be my own funding manager -I would have had it all set up on Nov 2nd (Halloween wasn’t good with me at the door and first Doctor Who episode on that night, and Nov 1st, my Dad and my only sibling were at the shooting range, plus Murdoch Mysteries that night).

It’s like my Dad paid for it on my behalf, but all they need to do is fill out the form to me to get remburised and send them back. I don’t know what the online forms look like, but I don’t think they can be too difficult but I don’t think we need to sign anything because all the signing of stuff happened when we signed the sheets

My mom says she will do it :within the next few days" but considering she said on Friday she would do it that night … I can’t seem to trust anything which come out of her mouth anymore.

Last year I made 2 cakes for Mom’s birthday, we didn’t have the 2nd cake until after my sister’s birthday (We had our first and only visit to my sister’s place). My Mom was busy doing something else (I forget what) and I kept bugging her about when would WE iced the cake because she kept putting it off saying “we would do it the next day”, but the next day comes doesn’t happen, She ended up icing it herself…but I had wanted to help

Had to go four million times through the same cycle of trying to get my parents to make that first phone call to get pysch assessment and this is what I had to put up with: “Why do you need a pysche assessment?” or “we could just look other places for supports” and other excuses but (all other supports just lead back to Development Services),

I had to deal with those two excuses to the point, I had someone call me on a day the parents weren’t home- and I got the ball rolling Well between those and Mom kept pushing back the adaptive and cognitive functioning for me for the pysch assessment. On Monday She would “push it back until tomorrow”, Next day comes (Tuesday), she says the excatly the same thing as the previous day. but this time (this was in early feb of this year and Dad had his 1st of two operations)-and her excuse this time is “dad might be in pain” I agreed to put it off one more day…but Wednesday comes and Mom’s starting to say stuff like “Well see” and crap like that which I means are “nos” from her.

And then not related to Development Services support or funding. Mom had made a plan for her and I to go to the mall on the 15th(?) of Nov and were going to take the bus there because Dad’s operation was that day. She broke that promise closer to the time because she “wanted to be near the phone in case something happened”… (and we have no cellphone at the moment due to the stupid phone company disconnecting it) and we didn’t go until last Tuesday-I had looked so forward to taking the *** bus for the first time since March 13, 2020.

So knowing her how can I trust her to actually do what she says she will do? She keeps pushing it back one more day, one more day. about everything.

Note: I seem to be wrong and my mom’s right-that funding is for Passport recipients and their families-but the money will be going to my account.

#9

I can’t seem to trust my Mom in doing anything with bacon funding reimbursement. It just it’s Dec 1st and it’s been over a month since I got my new computer and Mom still hasn’t done shit. Last Friday she said “she would do it that night” on Sunday or was it Monday she said “she would do it in the next few days” it’s Wednesday and she still hasn’t done it.

It’s just she kept pushing off doing anything which is related to Development Services/funding - the first problem was getting her to arrange a pysch assessment to the point, I ended up having to arrange it myself. Then in the middle of July (when we’re waiting to hear back) she said she would call in the first er 2nd week of August… But when August did roll around she didn’t call the 2nd week due to the Monday being Simcoe Day (her excuse was “people were just going back to the office”. Then once we got the information and sent it back the forms need to send back- we had to wait some more to find out if we could use it for “special” purposes and by that point it was late Sept, and then she had to send another email after Canadian Thanksgiving… and we did get a reply to that one in late October which is when we got the computer on the Saturday. Then when I asked about two weeks ago, my Mom said “the information given to us by the contact woman was to 'fill form out like you had done before” like the woman forgot we never filled out the form before. Then two Friday ago (the 19th) my parents got a call from the woman (they thought it was my case manager at first since both showed up as 'private caller")-and the woman told them they could do eclaim. Last Friday Mom said she would “do it that night” when I checked… but as of Monday she said she would do “it within the next few days” but it is Wednesday Dec 1st today, and she STILL hasn’t done it. I’m getting to the point, I want to just start the registration on my own. Just so it could get done already. and Mom thinks I’m the lazy one?

I know I said I wouldn’t mention it until Friday but I’m already in a bad mood, because I still can’t fucking date and only Mom’s and Dad’s notebook computers have web cameras And Mom’s sick of hearing me get cranked up about dating. But when I get cranked up about one thing (in this case dating) it’s goes on tangent about other stuff as well.

I mean at least I’m getting upset today and not tomorrow when we’re will have two guests over (my sister and her on and off again boyfriend)

I mean it’s not that I need that money… i don’t… it just I don’t want my parents to have to do it two three weeks before the final month like they do with the annual taxes they have to do)

#10

What’s stopping you from just doing it yourself ?

#11

because 1)my parents are in the house 24/7. and 2)my parents are the bacon funding managers. and 3)they get pissed off if I do stuff on my own.

#12

Do they monitor what you’re doing on the computer?

If I were you, I’d check out the form to see what they want to know. If it’s something you can handle, do it. If not, show it to your parents.

Either way, someone’s angry. Now it’s you. If you do it, they will be angry, but at least it’s done

#13

it’s not the form is only partly what I’m grumpy about. What I’m grumpy about is Mom wants to do it the online way and she still hasn’t even set up the goddam account for the online way. The online account only need three things: 1)the recipient’s name (mine), 2) the funding manager’s name (dad), and 3) the client’s code. Which can easily be found in the files they gave us in mid Sept

#14

My parents are so pissed off with me fighting with them. Mom says she wants to run away which means I would be kicked out of the house and I have no where to go. and Dad says he wouldn’t drive me tomorrow to the mall and yet a friend is expecting to be picked up by my Dad. (And Mom says what would the friend think of you if you tell them that you pissed off your Dad so much? Knowing my friends… they will think “Why the fuck do you have your parents as funding manager(s) and not do it yourself?” or “your parents suck”)

And since I don’t have a support worker to help me move out… (Mom’s idea not mine) Mom says its none of my business but I’m the one the money will be going back too since it’s MY bank account with them, not Dad’s or Mom’s. And Mom says that if I keep bugging them she will NEVER do it… which means we will never get reimbursed. Mom called me a “brat” but this is a thing to be bratty about…since the end month to get this in by March because their year “renews” in April. Oh and once again even though I didn’t bring it up…she doesn’t take responsibility for MAKING me a brat. Sure I made myself a brat, but I had helped by my parents letting me get my way. How can DAD be the one to get reimbursed until the money goes into MY account which can’t happen until someone does the entire job and send in the goddam form already? If I was my own funding manager I would have gotten the job in already…

@Sillsallad
I did just try to set up the eclaim account. But despite the funding people having my information, it’s not in the system for eclaim and yet it should be. It just Mom says “how would you like it if I kept bugging you about dishwasher or something?” but yet it’s not like I wait a whole month before emptying the dishwasher. Now if I waited 1-2 months to empty the dishwasher, then I would see a reason to be angry about the dillydallying. Which is basically what they’re doing waiting over a month to even do anything about this.

update: now I know the account’s sept up but next Tuesday mom has an online meeting about to fill out the form.