General story questions/story debates

Cleoptra, that’s what people said about our generation. This story is about zoomers, the next generation. There’s a whole different set of complains about them.

If you’re going to go on about the stereotypical complaints of the various generations, please complain with the correct generation. You and I are the entitled recipients of participation trophies. We’re also in our 30s to 40s. Zoomers, who are in their 20s have something else going on.

The kids that everyone complained got too many participation trophies have children ourselves and are messing up parenting in entirely different ways.

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Just gonna leave this here.

People have been complaining about the younger generation for millennia. But the current generations (zoomers and alphas) are generally pretty compassionate, willing to accept differences, and willing to make personal sacrifices to improve the world.

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I actually have experienced exactly this problem. My friends and I were at school camp, in the middle of nowhere. My friend had a serious asthma attack, to the point all she could do one afternoon was use her (it was a machine/pump of some sort). She couldn’t do the activities, which included strenuous hiking and other things like that. The teachers needed to take the other students but couldn’t leave my friend behind on her own… so they let me and one of our other friends stay behind with her. We spent the afternoon playing Go Fish in our shared bunk room.

Ok, a pack of cards aren’t a mobile phone… but I bet many of the other students would have liked to have stayed at camp rather than be forced to do all that physical activity. Yet I don’t remember anyone being jealous or complaining that they had to go.

The reason was probably that even at age 14-15, the other students knew that it was because my friend was unwell and not because of special treatment. She didn’t ask to stay behind, she was required to because she was unwell. It wasn’t fun for her and they knew that.

The key here is: empathy. They empathised with being ill and not wanting to be left alone, bored, away from home.

My guess also is that they much preferred the fun activities of being outside and going on flying foxes (ziplines) over playing Go Fish in a dank bunkroom. Maybe the other kids just aren’t the type to get jealous over phones?

(Your ice cream analogy fails here because this isn’t “get this thing everyone wants” but “get this thing everyone wants BECAUSE you are hurt”. Removing the hurt foot from the equation changes it, and you are right if it were just “girl sits in lounge and gets to have her phone while everyone else doesn’t” that would indeed be unfair. In this case though, the hurt foot is what makes it fair, because she can’t easily occupy herself. To use your ice cream analogy, it would be more like everyone got strawberry even though they all want chocolate, but this girl gets chocolate because the teachers want to make her feel better after hurting her foot)

The point here is that you are generalising how one person might feel or act (yourself?) and applying it to everyone else… when it might not be the case that anyone cares at all. Honestly, my experience shows that kids can be pretty mature about a lot of things. Maybe under 10 they might not understand things like sharing or “one person got something and I didn’t”, but plenty of older kids do and don’t act entitled about it.

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By the way, your mum is not only wrong but dangerously so. Keeping people hydrated is important and healthy and if a child asks for a drink of water it’s because they are thirsty, not because “someone else has it”. It’s very worrying that she would have this attitude which suggests that she is uninterested in the children’s welfare.

Rules parents tell their kids are sometimes bullshit. It sounds like your mum was trying to avoid being inconvenienced herself, or making you invisible around the other kids, and not really thinking about how other children actually behave in the real world.

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We got participation ribbons in school 15 years ago when I was a kid. They were stupid and got thrown out as soon as I got home without even showing my parents. Kids don’t give a shit about participation awards, they know they’re bullshit; they’re 100% for the parents.

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“I run the camp and when I decide X gets her cell phone because she hurt her foot and couldn’t do anything else, she gets her cell phone”.
Kids aren’t the mindless copy cats you seem to think they are.
My 4 year old nephew is quite capable of understanding that when we give his brother something extra for his birthday or for whatever reason, he doesn’t automatically get it too.

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I think most kids absolutely understand about rules being different for someone who has an obvious injury.

Most kids have empathy and care about fairness. Most kids would try to pull the ‘if A has their phone I should too’, but would understand the basic concept of ‘It’s not fair for A not to be able to do the fun stuff, not to be able to easily walk to and from her dorm, and not to be able to have her phone anywhere else’.

What kind of excuse for an adult would leave an injured girl, who is probably also in pain, to be either stuck on her bed all day or stuck bored in a common area just because they don’t want to tell other children ‘no’?

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I agree that kids are better at understanding rules and exceptions than people give them credit for. I definitely remember other kids getting something else/being treated different because of a special matter, like someone who felt sick could spend the school break inside and stuff like that. We all accepted that. The only thing we consistently nagged about being unfair was the fact that all the teachers could spend their breaks inside AND they could have cake. Two things that were forbidden for the students (1-6th grade) :rofl:

I had a discussion with my ten year old au-pair child ages back - she was mad about homework. Some other pupils had worked fast and finished their ordinary assignments in school and did their homework after that. She spent time chatting with her friends and only had time to finish the original assignment. She was very upset that the fast kids “didn’t have any homework”.

When being asked questions about this, like “Wouldn’t it be unfair for them to get more work to do, just because they worked faster? Wouldn’t that be like a punishment? What should they have done during the rest of class after they finished, if they didn’t do the homework? Wasn’t it unfair that she got to talk with her friends when they did their homework?” etc, etc… At the end she was happier about it all and the situation made more sense.

It feels like people are scared of talking with kids, explaining things and enforcing rules. That’s a parent issue, not some “kids don’t understand anyway” kind of thing.

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I could have drinks around the older kids (Gr.1-2, 3-4, and 5-6) I just couldn’t have a drink of water around Kindergartens (4-5 year olds) unless I went to the bathroom. And remember I been there since 8am and I wasn’t going to leave until 1:45pm despite camp being over until noon and snack time (back then) was at noon. so it means without a drink of water for me before noon means I hadn’t drunk anything since about 7:15am. (the snack time did change with the new leaders to something like 10:30am and besides water and snack time, I also have an extra cup of liquid because of the camp’s lunch for the youth)

Why weren’t the children allowed to drink water ?

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A bit meta here, but I’ve been reading through the anniversary roundups as they come in. Almost all the stories open in a new tab rather than going there in the same tab. There’s also no roundup footer, so you can’t move directly between stories.

Do people prefer if the stories open in the same tab or the new tab? Personally, I prefer if they’re in the same tab, because if I want to open them in a new tab, I can control+click to make that happen. I don’t know how if there’s a keyboard shortcut to stop it from opening in a new tab.

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I prefer to open stories in a new tab as default, but for later. Clicking a link that opens in a new tab takes you to that new tab right away, I prefer to always right click and open all the new tabs I want, then go back and read them.

Then again, I am one of those people who may have a few too many tabs open. Did you know phone chrome updated so if you have over a certain number of tabs open you get a smiley face where it would normally tell you how many other tabs are available?

I think in general I prefer default links to not open new tabs, and then I can choose to open new tabs.

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The problem was if one 4-5 year old child saw me drinking water in the kitchen (or so my mom claimed) They would want a drink of water and if that happened all their other 4-5 year olds would want a drink of water as well-so either they would never get to the activity in the kitchen (some kind of cooking) or they would never get to the their next activity (drama, song, sports, arts/crafts) depending on when in the morning it was since the time of when the kids arrived differs from Monday-Thursday (Fridays don’t count either then or now) -like Day 1 they could be the 2nd group in the kitchen, the next day first group, third day last group, and 3rd group on Thursday. At least if they’re the last group we could say “it’s snack time soon, so you will be able to have juice soon”

The 4-5 years olds were normally the biggest group with something like 7-8 kids. Most of the other groups only had like 4-5, 6 at the most.

depends on what else I’m multi tasking w/ Sometimes I would perfer to go straight to the story on the same tab other times I would prefer it to go to a new tab

  1. If kids want water, they should be given water. Dehydration is a major killer of small children.

  2. If you have juice for kids, you should have pretty small cups for that. If you give all the 4-5s a small cup of water, it shouldn’t take too long.

But this is aside from the point. Your mom told you that you couldn’t drink water around the 4-5s, but you could around all the older children, 6 and up. That implies that children 6 and older can understand that they may not be able to have water at that time. The camp was for 12-25 year olds. That is a fair bit older than 6 years old.

Also, given how strict the camp was, I doubt they were thinking about what the other kids would want. I mean, camp management threw a fit over a girl wearing pajamas in front of boys. I suspect they’re the type of people who have rules for the sake of rules and anyone who disobeys is sinful or whatever.

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It is more important for children and volunteers to be properly hydrated than for them to do a particular activity.

If all the children would want water, that means they would all be thirsty. Forcing thirsty children to wait hours before they can drink is not OK. Were you happy being thirsty? Do you think the children were? Do you think that was a good rule?

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I can’t remember about then, but apparently more recently a lot of the kids of all ages have water bottles or in some cases they had energy drink with them so they could drink that.

And I didn’t make the rules Mom’s the boss in the kitchen. I just was 12-17 year old helper whose only job was to clean up the garbage from the activities, and make the juice for snack time. And occasionally having to open up the freezer (which we had locked) to get ice packs for kids whom hurt themselves. As well as opening them to get cans of juice for the next day/or ice cream for Friday’s lunch party!

I was able to have water as long as I waited for breaks in between the groups OR go to the bathroom to have a drink. But it doesn’t apply anymore since anyone can get water now because of the water dispenser at church now for Bible Camp and other events

and Nope I didn’t think it was a fair rule at all since I would be at the church from at least 8ish and not leave till almost 1:45pm. So except for juice at noon-(the then-snack time) I hadn’t had anything since 7:15am. Mom and I are still leaving the church at the same time now but with three differences: 1)snack time is about 10:30am, and 2)there’s a youth lunch for the youth and that means if there’s enough food which there usually is Mom and I can have some food of whatever it was (subs for instance) and 3)I can help myself with water without having to worry about kids seeing me having a cup of water since its “okay” now for me to have a cup of water around children when there’s a water dispener but for some reason “wasn’t” okay when there wasn’t one.

Especially during the summer.

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Could we move on from this topic?

The way I read the site, I skim the stories and open the ones I want to read more deeply/check the comments on in new tabs for after I’ve gone through all the new stories. I would prefer if all of the links besides general navigation opened in new tabs. However, I don’t read roundups and opening a new tab is very easy while keeping things in the same tab is not.

I don’t have concerns about it, but your concerns are valid. As for the footer linking the stories, I don’t think they do any actual extra work on the stories they pick and they just highlight the stories in one place. This is part of why I don’t read roundups.

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