I work in a fine-dining restaurant. Our clientele can get a little eccentric.
Customer: “I want the chicken pasta but with no chicken.”
Me: “So, just the pasta by itself?”
Customer: “No, I want chicken pasta with no chicken.”
Me: “Our pasta dishes are all made fresh. We just add chicken, beef, and so on, on top based on the dish being ordered. What would you like on your pasta?”
The customer is not really paying attention, just waving me away.
Customer: “I want chicken pasta with no chicken.”
I simply shrug and tell the chef, who presents everything we normally put on a chicken pasta plate, minus the actual chicken. When I bring it out:
Customer: “That was too fast! This can’t possibly be my dish.”
Me: “Like I was saying, ma’am, our pasta dishes are all made fresh. We simply made the pasta and added the ingredients normally found on the chicken pasta, just minus the chicken.”
Customer: *Listening for the first time* “Oh… so you didn’t have to go about picking out the chicken?”
Me: “No, ma’am. That would have taken forever!”
Customer: “Oh, I thought I’d be setting you all to work. That’s disappointing.”
She reluctantly eats her meal, but she seems to be genuinely upset that she didn’t set us an impossible task. She tries to stump us at dessert.
Customer: “Your pistachio cheesecake… Are the pistachios—”
Me: “They’re sprinkled on top along with a compote. If you order it without the pistachios, we wouldn’t need to go through the cake picking out particulates of nut.”
Customer: *Disappointed* “I… see.”
She ordered it anyway. She still paid the full chicken pasta price for her plain pasta.